


Let it all out

by Julieseven



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Friendship, Other, Sana unleashed, support from friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-11-08 04:28:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11074074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Julieseven/pseuds/Julieseven
Summary: Sana talks to Jamilla after finding the ellevillevilde2 insta account and makes a shocking decision.





	Let it all out

**Author's Note:**

> this is basically a comfort fic I wrote right before the clip "Fucker over vennene sine" dropped. I needed my Queen Sana to have some kind of release.

Sana calls Jamilla in her lunch break right after seeing the horrible Instagram account the Pepsi Max created in Vilde's name. Her head is spinning with rage and fear and guilt, but she has to talk to someone.

"Hello?"

"Hei, thanks for answering", Sana says, and walks into an empty classroom, closing the door behind her.

"What is it, Sana, you sound stressed?", Jamilla says in her quiet, calm voice. Sana takes a few deep breaths and sits down at one of the desks.

"Okhati, I have to tell you something." Sana's voice is shaking and she has to put a hand on the desk to steady herself.

"It's okay, Sana, you can tell me anything."

Sana nods to herself and clears her throat. "Astagfirullah, my friend, I did something very bad."

And then she tells Jamilla everything. About the conversation she overheard at the karaoke club, and the casual remark Isak made a week later about Sara talking behind Vilde’s back, and how she went to his place to take pictures of the messages he'd mentioned. She tells her how she just felt so helpless and hated the feeling of losing her friends over something as stupid as a freaking russ bus.

By the time she talks about the nasty Instagram account in Vilde's name, she's all but sobbing into the phone. "Wallah, I never meant for this to come back to Vilde, Jamilla. All I wanted was to get my friends back and to show Sara that talking shit behind people's backs can backfire. But now …"

Sana takes a deep breath and suddenly can't hold back the tears anymore. Jamilla doesn’t speak but just lets Sana cry until her tears finally subside.

"I'm a horrible person, aren't I?", she asks finally, wiping her face with the back of her hand and trying to compose herself.

Jamilla lets out a long breath. "Wow, Sana, that's some really bad trouble you've gotten yourself into", she says, and Sana is relieved to hear that her tone doesn't sound accusing. "But no, I don't think you're a bad person, habibti."

She sighs and then goes on: "Posting those messages was a mistake, but what that girl said in the messages was much worse. And attacking your friend like that is like … the most unfair and vile thing I have ever heard of."

Sana feels the tears well up in her throat again at the thought of Vilde and how she must feel right now. "What should I do now? I have to help Vilde", Sana cries, closing her eyes to try and ground herself. "She's been unfair to me and said some things I wish I could scream at her for, but this … she doesn't deserve this."

Sana can almost hear Jamilla nod at the other end of the line. "Sana, I know I shouldn't say this because it's Ramadan, but ... I'm sure Allah will forgive you since this is about helping a friend …" she begins, and Sana sits up straighter.

"Tell me what?"

Jamilla sighs again and then clears her throat. "You have to give those girls hell for attacking your friend like this. It's your decision whether or not you want to tell them that it was you who posted the messages, but you can't let them get away with this."

Fear creeps through Sana's entire body, from her toes all the way to her fingertips. "They will all hate me", she whispers, but she already knows Jamilla is right. "But you're right, I deserve it."

Jamilla almost laughs. "No, habibti, you don't deserve being hated, not you. But you can't carry this burden with you, it will poison your soul."

Sana nods slowly, and from one second to another, the cold fear creeping through her veins turns into boiling anger.  _ Damn those bitches! _

"You're right. I will give them hell."

"Insha'Allah, Sana, you will do the right thing"; Jamilla says, sounding almost proud. Sana clears her throat and dabs her face with her hijab to make sure her tears will no longer be visible.

"Jazakallah, okhati, this really helped", she says curtly and hangs up the phone.

Sana gets up and walks over to the sink in the corner of the classroom. She adjusts her hijab so it fits tightly around her neck and then washes her face, careful not to swallow any of the water.

Dabbing her face with a paper towel, she decides that she doesn't look angry enough and pulls out her lipstick.

A minute later, Sana storms out of the empty classroom and makes her way downstairs out onto the school yard. Her heart is hammering in her chest as she looks for her girls. They are standing in the far corner opposite the main entrance of the school, and in the middle of the yard, she spots  _ them. _

Sara, the coward, is still hiding in her cabin, but Ingrid, Olivia, Iselin and a few others are standing in a circle, throwing occasional smirks and dirty looks in Vilde's direction, and Sana wants to puke.

But instead, she charges towards them as fast as she can without running, grabbing Ingrid by her arm and whirling her around.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?" Sana screams, and she can feel at least a hundred pairs of eyes turning in her direction. Ingrid stares at her in disbelief and the rest of the girls look as if Sana had slapped them all in the face.

"Sana, we had to ..:", Ingrid tries, but Sana doesn't let her finish.

"It was ME, you fucktards! I overheard you talking about throwing me off the bus at the karaoke club and when I found out Sara has been talking shit about everyone, I had to get back at her. For shittalking me, my friends and half the school, apparently. But you FUCKING IDIOTS are probably just as bad as her and instead of seeing her for the backstabbing piece of shit she is, you defend her and attack MY FRIEND, who has gone through enough SHIT in her life without you making her feel even worse?"

 

Sana takes a deep breath and before any of the girls can say anything she goes on. "The fact that you can still sleep is unimaginable to me. You are the dirtiest excuses for human beings I have ever seen, and believe me, this will ALL come back to you. One day, you will be made to feel like crap yourselves, and I hope to GOD it will hurt a hundred times as much as you've hurt me and my friends! You deserve to fucking choke, all of you!"

And with that, Sana turns around and walks away, but not without throwing a short glance over at Vilde and the girls. Vilde looks wrecked, like she's been crying all morning, and Sana wishes she could go over there and hug her. But the look on Vilde's face is full of shock and disappointment, making Sana's heart hurt even more.

So she turns away and walks back towards the school, breaking into a run shortly before she reaches the main entrance.

Once inside, Sana tries to run up the stairs to go back to that empty classroom, but her knees are too weak. She's barely made it up the first flight of stairs when she collapses onto her hands and knees. Retching painfully for a few moments, she fears she will choke on her own tears, but before she can panic, she feels a hand on her back.

Sana starts and whirls around to see Eva in front of her, looking worried and shocked. "Sana, what the fuck was that?"

Taking a shuddering breath, Sana shrugs and tries to pull herself together. Clearing her throat, she looks straight into Eva's eyes.

"The truth", she says simply, and Eva sucks her breath in.

"So, you really posted ..:" she says hesitantly, and Sana nods, praying for the ground to open up and swallow her.

That doesn't happen of course, and Sana feels the tears welling up again, but before she can try and run away, Eva puts both arms around her and pulls her close.

Sana is shocked at first and thinks of trying to disengage herself, but her knees are still too wobbly to carry her. So she lets Eva hug her, not moving a muscle.

Eva runs her hands up and down Sana's back, quietly murmuring into her ear. "You're such a bad-ass, Sana. I don't care that you posted these messages, Sara needed to be exposed. And what you just did out there … fuck, that might just have been the most amazing thing I've ever seen anyone do for their friends."

Sana can't believe what she's hearing, but Eva keeps talking about how strong and fierce she thinks Sana is, and soon the tears Sana is fighting aren't tears of sorrow anymore.

"Why don't you hate me?" she asks after a while, moving her head back to look incredulously at Eva, who just smiles gently and cups Sana's face with one hand.

"Are you kidding? I would go to hell for hating you."

And despite the fear and guilt in her heart, Sana has to laugh. Eva laughs with her and pulls her into a hug again. "Whatever happens, you will never lose me, Sana", she whispers at Sana's ear.

Sana smiles against Eva's shoulder and hugs her back, thinking that if this is what happens when she speaks her mind, she should do it more often.


End file.
